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Dear Crystal,
Today is five years since we started dating. Five years. That’s crazy, right? Genuinely unbelievable? Five years since we realized we wanted to hold hands and kiss and stuff and said, “Hey, let’s try this relationship thing” and then you kissed me real aggressively and got a bloody nose all over my chest. Good, memorable, wonderful times.
You’re the best person I know and not just because you not only [more...]
Epping, North Dakota is a really, really small town 20 miles north east of where we are here in Williston. It was founded in 1905 along the Great Northern Railway.
When I say “small town,” I really, really mean small. Like, unbelievably small. Small like it has a total area of 0.38 square miles. Small like it had a population of exactly 100 in the 2010 census. Small like [more...]
I live in North Dakota now! It’s weird!

I’ve been here for about a month and a half and it’s starting to feel like “home” even though I’m having a hard time calling it that?! Like, every time we’re out somewhere I say, “Are we heading back to the house now?” or whatever and if I talk about L.A. I say “home” [more...]
Okay, so here’s an announcement:
The girlfriend and I are moving to North Dakota in three weeks.
I’ve already posted about my parents moving there and now, for a variety of reasons that we have spent the last few months avoiding/denying/trying to fix, we to are North Buttkota bound.

We both have really mixed feelings, a large portion of which are borne [more...]
Yesterday was Halloween! And I stayed home and read stuff on the internet in between answering the door and giving small children candy.
But before that, I went to an empty lot near my house, bought some large squash from a stranger, then came back to my house and hacked it apart before sticking a lit candle in it and putting it on my front porch.
Halloween is the BEST and SO WEIRD.
[more...]
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jam-a-day june 1. the subways, "no goodbyes"
2. john prine & iris dement, "in spite of ourselves"
3. squeeze, "heaven knows" 4. lou reed, "this magic moment"
5. the get up kids, "mass pike"
6. roberta flack, "the first time ever i saw your face"
7. green day, "redundant"
8. crowded house, "distant sun"
9. rilo kiley, "always"
10. the matches, "to build a mountain"
11. mclusky, "she will only bring you happiness"
will write for $$$ I am super, extra, enthusiastically available for freelance! You need it written, I can write it, yo. freeashlance@gmail.com
disclaimery
Most images used on the site are mine. If they aren't mine, I probably snagged them from Google Image Search without noting credit. If it's yours and you don't want it here/want credit, let me know. I promise I'm not trying to be a jerk!
The products I talk about and link are generally purchased by me with my girlfriend's hard-earned money. I link to amazon.com via affiliate links because I would like to buy some more stuff with my own less hard-earned money. The recommendations are 100% genuine and you should never feel pressured to make purchases through amazon.com or my affiliate links. I'm cool that way. If I ever review, recommend, or write about something given to me or in some way paid for by a company, I promise you'll know.
Also, it should go without saying that I in no way represent or speak on behalf of any company I currently work for, have worked for in the past, or may work for in the future. My terrible opinions and poop jokes are mine and mine alone.
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